Even in mourning, good doesn't change
I’ve heard of some unfortunate passings lately, and then I found this Letter to a Mourning Friend on Sharon’s blog. An excerpt:
Even in your grief, if you pay close attention you will see the signs that love still abounds about you; and that the love you felt has been transformed into something even more lovely and long-lasting. …
It is always an upward progression. Nothing is ever lost.
There’s lots in life we could mourn. Loved ones leaving us, jobs ending, losing our homes, destruction in the news. Change. Sometimes even good changes can lead to a sense of disorientation as we leave behind the old and embrace the new.
But Sharon has hit on what I think of as an undeniable spiritual principle. The good is never lost. The spiritual essence of the person or the place or the activity cannot end, for it’s sourced in Spirit. Spirit and its elements fill all space. You can’t be separated from that good, even if the outward expression of it changes.
I’m thinking deeply about this because I have a change coming up quite soon. It’s possible that both my children will be away at school in the fall, leaving me as an empty-nester four years earlier than I expected. In many ways I’m looking forward to it, yet I also know there will be an adjustment. And the question of “Who am I without the kids?” looms in the back of my mind whenever I think about it.
Yet the void that they fill in my heart will still be filled by Spirit. If I’m not loving them face-to-face, I still can do so in my prayers. And I can expect that love to find expression throughout my days, with the other people I meet. I don’t need to stop loving just because they’re gone. There are always plenty of people to love if you let yourself.
So I will try, as Sharon recommends, to pay close attention to see the opportunities for love around me. To honor my love for them with a widened, more expansive love for others. To not let sadness or loneliness seep in, but to fill my soul with Spirit’s grace.
“Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted.” Perhaps that’s how it works—we are comforted when we know that even when things change, the goodness remains the same.
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